Your Prerogative To Be Offended

Crunch, crunch, crunch! Is that the sound of eggshells being broken by those who dare to tread on forbidden topics while in your presence? Or, are you so busy avoiding potential landmines when conversing with a (hyper) sensitive friend or relation that you’re left feeling drained and uncomfortable, always having to second guess what will cause offence?

If this were a job application stating that, "Only the thin-skinned need apply", who would be the likely candidate?

• Expecting others to be mind readers - all of us have rules and regs (consciously or not), which determine what will or will not offend us -it's each person's responsibility to be clear about what's expected.

• Generational legacy (particularly in family feuds) - children quickly learn that the only way to resolve differences is to cut off all communication with the (supposed) evil-doer.

• Miscommunication - consider the context in which things are said or done. What are the odds you may have misunderstood or misinterpreted what transpired?

• Benefits of reflection over brooding – it’s not a criminal offense to take time to respond to some remark which MIGHT have been insensitive; rather than endlessly mulling it over, get feedback from a trusted individual who has a different perspective on the situation.

• "The teapot calling the kettle black"? - intolerant of others' traits which you may have: rarely think you're wrong, bored when having to listen to others, easily irritated and untrusting, can't abide anything less than perfection (the list continues, ad nauseum).

• The ultimate insult is not having others take your advice – whatever happened to freedom of choice?

• Learn to jokingly parry or simply ignore - when the expected rise is not gotten, the person quickly learns you are not an easy mark and goes onto the next victim.

•Lighten up and give the benefit of the doubt-chalk it up to someone having a bad day, being in a bad place, etc. and relish the ridiculousness of the situation (in other words, laugh at it!).

• Whether the offender or the offendee, could this be an instance of hypocrisy under the guise of political correctness?


And remember, taking action is the catalyst for change!